I Wasn't His Lover, I Was His Victim

Disclaimer: This text contains strong language and discusses sexual abuse. Read with caution.

Star LaBranche was born exactly one month before Jem and the Holograms aired on television. The poet currently resides in Virginia Beach, VA, she works at ECPI University in Content Marketing and attends classes in their Business Administration program. Star describes herself as a dedicated cat mom, and enjoys quiet evenings at home with her Maine Coon mix, Happy Cat. With a transparent use of language, LaBranche's poems reflect on the pains of being a woman in today's world.

FIX YOUR LIPSTICK

childhood taught me I was helpless

and when he took over with the lessons

it was moving from high school to college

but I would fix my lipstick and leave my

house as if whatever he said was absolute truth

and I was a liar sullying his kingdom

when he touched me I thought, this is it,

this is love, this is passion, this is someone

who cared about me caring about me so much

I gave a self to him that wasn’t mine to give

and he took this self that wasn’t his to possess

I gave everything with no thought to consequence

because what consequences are there when you’re 17?

not the same consequences he had, a man in his thirties,

telling me he loved me after one week together

for years I never questioned the beauty of his skin on mine,

but when the dust settles and reality becomes a mirror

you watch your past failures in, a niggling feeling sets in

I wasn’t an equal in a relationship that he ended with silence

I wasn’t every heart-broken girl left crying herself to sleep

I wasn’t his lover between his dirty sheets, I was his victim

**

Photos by @deanastacia