She Held Onto A Love That Was All Wrong

She Held Onto A Love That Was All Wrong

By: Cultura Colectiva -

Poet Joshua Jennifer Espinoza believes language can be both a medium for transformation as well as a way for us to find our own identity. In her own words, Espinoza writes poetry to better understand herself and her position, but she also writes to honor the history that she's part of. In the poem "Gangrenous Love", we witness the healing process of the souls that are ill from the poisons of toxic love.

She Held Onto A Love That Was All Wrong 1


gangrenous love fills everything. a mind made blank

by careless hands turns purple in the sun. the fear

of closeness ripens. she had threatened to split her lips

open while the ocean made sounds in the distance.

every crashing wave gave water to the air as an

offering. the boys were off rolling blunts and laughing

too loud to hear all the violence. time stretches

and folds in on itself. time is a body full of damage

that is constantly trying to forget, though it always

remembers on the long drive home. the freeway is

such a beautiful trigger. machines like cold fruit

falling from city to city until one day they find

the soil. the same soil she moved her fingers through

when she thought of the love she gave away. the love

she held onto. all wrong, all backwards, all pus-

covered memory. she slips into something more

comfortable, another reality. somewhere things are okay.

somewhere she is hacking off old limbs and dreaming

                                                     of velvety silence.


Originally published in Anomaly #25.


Photos by @Deanastacia.