Do you dream of holding the rope or would you rather feel the sweet pain of being submitted? The relationship between sex and power is something we discover during the first sexual encounters. Violence means taking the reins in order to dominate someone. Someone who chooses to be the submissive agrees to let go, to be vulnerable and allow the other person to dispose of their body for carnal purposes.
Perhaps what attracts you is the need to feel your lover’s body deeply. You want to melt into your desire’s body, to feel pleasure so vast that you would die if you don't join body and mind. Maybe you can fulfill Aristophanes’ dream, for your bodies to stop being two incomplete parts in order to become a perfect entity created by the gods.
Do you wish to transform an erotic sexual encounter into a more personal endeavor? To travel the body, exploring like nobody else, allowing yourself to construct your own orgasm? To reach the peak of pleasure through self stimulation, since only you know what you like, and how you like it best. Maybe one day someone will get to know you that way, but right now it doesn’t matter.
It’s possible you have noticed your satisfaction is not what it could be. You search for more because you’re sure you’ll be able to find new heights of pleasure. You are truly free in the act, but not even you are safe from imposed limits. Each time you try to get higher, scream louder, screw harder, and finish in the most spectacular way. The feeling of being undone makes you search for more and discover passion beyond your imagination.
Hues are irrelevant. They trick you into believing what’s white or black. But life is shaded in colors and sensations. Lights are turned on to gaze at a satisfied face, to admire your lover’s body, to realize you’re in the midst of something great, and that you’re having sex. Or lights are off so that you may lose yourself in the fusion of senses, expecting the rejoicing that you know will come to you, but never know when.
Your fantasies free you, leave you imagining what you would never dare doing, or even lead you to discover what you truly desire. You fantasize with discovering who you really are. Fulfilling those dreams becomes a double edge sword. Because doing them gives you new ideas.
Live out your fantasies. Look for what arouses you. Whatever it is that turns you on, find that spark that lights up inside you. Combine your intimacy with the comfort you need and discover that pleasure is not a matter of one, two, or more individuals, but of whatever you have in mind.
$afia Bahmed-Schwartz is the creator of these erotic illustrations. She is also a designer, rapper, director, visual artist, and much more. Her versatility has led her to produce works loaded with sexuality and social commentary. While her Muslim background has made her a controversial artist for some in her native France, she has earned acclaim from the independent circuit in Europe.