When I turned 15, I decided that I didn’t want a traditional quinceañera party, so my aunt and uncle took me and my cousin to Europe. It was amazing. We went sightseeing in Paris, visiting all those amazing places in the city, when all of a sudden, they started fighting because my aunt wanted to visit one place, but my uncle didn’t. After making a scene and yelling at each other in the middle of the Parisian streets, my uncle walked away and we continued our quite odd and awkward tour. Now, every time I have to travel with a couple that starts fighting, I wonder why they’re being so stupid. I mean, you’re in a wonderful place you won’t be visiting again in a while, so why ruin it with your stupid arguments? Also, are those are going to be the memories you have of this place? Do you really think that’s worth it?
Obviously, this experience stuck in my mind, and the first time I decided to go on a trip with a partner, I encouraged him to have a long talk about basically everything to make the trip an unforgettable experience rather than an awkward and disastrous one. So, here are some of the things we discussed and that I’m sure they ended up working out well to prevent chaos.
Solve any urgent issues before leaving
Number one rule when traveling with your partner: work out any problems and issues you might have with them before the trip. Actually, that’s what ended up ruining our Paris trip; they just used a random thing as an excuse to air out old issues, and this is something very common in every single relationship. The thing is that when you’re far from home, in a different space, any random issue you bring out can turn into a horrible fight you won’t want to experience. So, just talk everything out before leaving.
Make all the trip’s decisions together
When I say all, I literally mean all, from picking the destination, to the lodging, schedule, means of transportation, everything! Sometimes, once you’re already at your destination, one of you doesn’t find it that exciting because it isn’t really what you wanted to do, and the smallest thing can spark a big fight, so make sure you include stuff that both of you like. Also, try planning everything ahead, the places you want to visit, if there’s a particular activity you want to do, your expectations for the trip (if you want to relax or go exploring); again, try planning your days together so that you both know what’s going to happen.
Anticipate any possible outcome
Now, you can plan out every second of your trip, but you can’t control everything, and it’s possible for things to turn out differently than you planned. Try anticipating any possible outcome together, so that you don’t start pointing fingers at the other if something goes wrong.
Be clear about everything money-related
This is also quite an important point and something you should settle right when you decide to go on this trip. I hate to admit it, but money is something really important to bear in mind, if not the most important thing. All trips cost money, so it’s better to leave things clear from the beginning to avoid any uncomfortable situations once you’re away. This includes: who’s paying for what, if you’re using a shared account, the budget for food, entertainment, travel expenses, and so on.
Make you sure you have “me time” during the trip
Naturally, if you’re going somewhere as a couple, you’ll want to spend time together, right? Well, as it happens in your everyday life, having solo time is crucial for having a happy and healthy relationship, and when you go on a trip, it shouldn’t be an exception. On the contrary, it’s a great opportunity to think and reflect about your own life while breaking your routine. Believe me, going your separate ways for just a couple of hours to do whatever each one of you wants is a good idea.
The purpose of the trip must be clear
Finally, and also quite important, both of you must have the purpose and intentions of the trip quite clear. Whether it’s a romantic getaway, a sightseeing trip, or a relaxing weekend, whatever the purpose of the trip is, it must be clear for both of you, so that you don’t expect something that won’t happen. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t do other things. I mean, you can have a romantic getaway and do some sightseeing, but both of you must be on the same page.
At the end of the day, the most important thing to keep in mind is that this is a chance for you to experience new things as a couple. You’re creating shared memories that you won’t want to ruin with stupid fights, especially if they could’ve been avoided with organization and communication. Now, you can do everything perfectly and still, something might happen that sparks a fight; things happen. In this case, it’s important to know if this is the right moment and the right place (more importantly) to start an argument. After all, your number one priority is to enjoy your trip with the person you love.
Don’t leave without checking these out:
5 Unique Experiences You Should Try Out The Next Time You Travel
12 Big Life Lessons You Can Only Get From Traveling In Your 20s
Guide To Living The Nomad Life Van Style
Images by @alexandras.atlas