Not Everyone Is A Love Guru: Five Types Of People Who Give The Worst Relationship Advice.
10 de septiembre de 2018Hugo Marquez
These are the five types of people you should not listen to when it comes to relationship advice. Listen to your heart and don’t pay much attention to these unreliable love gurus who will give you the worst relationship advice.
They say the road to hell is paved with good intentions, and I'm definitely guilty of this. I have given terrible advice to my friends when they’ve been in relationships. As an alumn of the “Sex And The City School For Single People Who Can't Single Good," I sure gave ridiculous pieces of advice back in the day. It wasn’t until tables turned for me that I was able to comprehend how useless my advice had been. So, after ruining my chances of getting a serious relationship (three times!), I feel qualified to tell you the 5 kinds of people who give the worst relationship advice and why you really shouldn't listen to what they say.
The Friend-Zone Dweller
Either you've been in the friend zone yourself, or you have a friend who has been. As a friend, it's always hard to see how, no matter the dedication, perseverance, or efforts they make to get out of this dangerous and painful limbo, they make no progress. No disrespect, but how can you rely on someone so blind and stubborn? People like this are the reason why the expression “holding on to a dream” was invented, and they'll probably will give you advice such as “be patient, it’ll all work out eventually,” or “just be a good listener.” Remember, some problems are about taking action, instead of waiting it out.
The “I’m In Love With Love”
The classic “Jane Austen meets Coldplay meets 500 Hundred Days of Summer” junkie. This person is so blinded by their addiction to unrealistic depictions of love that they lack perspective and objectivity. Their advice is always something like, “Why don’t you take them to a fancy dinner?” or “you should try to gain his love back... take him to Paris!” Seriously, they would even think that any complication in your relationship is just another proof of love, just like they probably believe that Romeo and Juliet is just the most romantic love story ever. Seriously, don’t even bother.
The “Hurt Me But Don’t Leave Me”
This person should get advice rather than give it. Basically, this kind of people are emotionally dependent and also masochists who would do everything they can to hang on to a painful and toxic relationship. They could give you some thoughtful and helpful advice, but it's more likely that they'll help you realize why you need to love yourself first. The kind of advice they’ll give you will be something like “let him win this one” or “sometimes it’s better to give in a little.” Seriously, how can they give advice or have any kind of perspective when they’re submerged in a toxic, demanding, and dependent relationship? Be a good friend, listen to them, and show them how valuable and loveable they are, so they find a way to end things.
This person doesn’t believe in love because they don't believe in commitment. Sometimes they enjoy their no-strings-attached comfort zone, and sometimes they just like to play with the emotions of others. Different hook-ups throughout the month or what I call a season of “disposable dating” make them unsuitable to give advice on how to keep a relationship healthy. This person will always think about quitting. Okay, okay, they might be very sensitive and empathetic people who can make the effort to put themselves in your shoes, but they’ll always lack the “experience” factor. It might be healthy for you to hang out with them to have a different perspective on your relationship, but at the end of the day, how can they tell you what it takes to keep the relationship going when they haven’t even taken a chance themselves.
I know this is a strike on us, but hey, we’re just telling you “LISTEN, you should NOT to listen to these five kinds of people.” Google always gives the worst advice on almost everything and rarely gets it right (like when you just have a common cold, but you’re already drafting up your will because Google said you have lung cancer symptoms). Unless you’re looking for a nice restaurant to take your partner, or references for a couples therapist, stay away from what Google suggests.
So, after years of research, I’ve realized that these are five types of people you should not ask for relationship advice (or just don’t take them too literally). They might mean well, and most of the time they will really try to help, but the truth is that it takes two to make a relationship work. People outside of it don’t know what’s at stake or how you actually feel. So, I suggest that you take advice as a tool to get some perspective and not as if it were instructions to achieve happiness. Last but not least, listen to your partner, listen to the perspective of those who care for you, but mostly remember that first, you should take care of the oldest relationship in your life and that is with yourself.
Other articles you might be interested in:
30 Ways To Show Your Feelings For Your Partner Without Saying "I Love You"
25 Things That Can Gradually Kill The Love In Your Relationship
10 Moments That Will Happen When A Breakup Is On The Horizon