From the creators of ghosting, benching, zombieing, and other lovely modern dating terms, comes Gatsbying, the practice of showing off on social media to get your crush's attention.
Besides the sumptuosity and elegance of the roaring twenties that everybody praises in Scott Fitzgerald’s The Great Gatsby, the novel became a literary classic due to the plot and themes explored in the novel. It tells the story of a Yale graduate that becomes acquainted with Jay Gatsby, a mysterious man famous for his extravagant and wild parties. Now, this won’t be a school analysis on the novel. However, as it happens with classics in history, they can have an influence in every aspect of life, like culture, films, other books, and even relationships. So, from the creators of terms like ghosting, benching, zombieing, and other lovely modern dating terms, comes Gatsbying (great name by the way), a practice we’ve all done at least once.
You might be thinking, “Why do you say that? You don’t know me!” But let me tell you, if you have a social media platform and you’ve had a crush on someone, I’m 99.99% sure you have practiced Gatsbying. So, what’s this all about? In Fitzgerald’s novel, Gatsby has an endless crush with Daisy Buchanan Fay. In order to get her attention, he starts leading this extravagant and sumptuous lifestyle, including his legendary parties.
So, in a very witty way, whoever came up with the term Gatsbying, made a great analogy between this guy’s attitude and our twenty-first-century behavior in social media. In other words, it refers to the practice of posting pictures, showing a great lifestyle to get tons of likes and reactions so that our crush notices how interesting we are. See, I’ve done it, you’ve done it, everyone has done it. But is it really the wisest thing to do?
Somehow, in our alternative digital life, our craving for attention has been transformed into the necessity of liking and being liked on social media. It would seem that nowadays our value is determined by how many friends or followers we have in a determined platform or how many thumbs up or heart logos we get in each post.
Put in that way, it sounds kind of lame and, to be honest, quite sad. However, it’s become the norm and, moreover, it’s something we’ve done since the dawn of time. We’re self-worshiping beings who feed off attention, and these new social practices have given us what we’ve always wanted: a space to show off and be liked by others. But is it really the way to gain the heart of our crush?
The answer really depends on where you stand and what you want. But the real question here is, does it really work? Frankly, I don’t think this might be the most effective dating technique, and let me tell you why. Gatsbying makes you look as an interesting person and, thus, an excellent dating choice. The number of likes or hearts you receive kind of work as the audience's approval of your dating material, but at the end of the day, the novel doesn’t have a happy ending. I mean, leaving the series of events that lead to Gatsby’s fatal ending, his plans to attract Daisy's attention don't really work to make them meet again. On the contrary, they already had a history together, so it’s not the parties that impress Daisy.
Translating that into social media, sadly this isn’t the way to really get to your crush’s heart. You can get their attention and they might think that, based on your digital activity, you’re an interesting person, but at the end of the day, your personality and who you really are will determine someone’s attraction to you. To sum up, you can have as many likes as you want and present yourself as the most desirable and intriguing person in the world, but face to face communication is what will determine if there’s a chance of having a relationship with that person or not.
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Images by @lavacavaa