The 6 Reasons Why People Say "I Have Feelings For You"

The 6 Reasons Why People Say "I Have Feelings For You"

Avatar of Maria Isabel Carrasco

By: Maria Isabel Carrasco

April 3, 2017

Lifestyle The 6 Reasons Why People Say "I Have Feelings For You"
Avatar of Maria Isabel Carrasco

By: Maria Isabel Carrasco

April 3, 2017

Boy meets girl, boy and girl fall in love, they get married and live happily ever after. We all have seen in literature, films, and television this idealized love story. But how often does this happen? Generally, when we meet someone we like, we wish things to go as smoothly like in the fairy tales. You go out for a couple of dates and suddenly one of you pronounces the magical words: "I have feelings for you." And after the big confession, both continue the relationship and are happy forever... Does this actually happen? What does the "I have feelings for you" really even mean?

It is generally accepted that this sentence means you're falling in love with someone. But is it true? To begin with, there are thousands of feelings, and not all are exactly related to love. So, there are many possibilities and meanings behind those words we all wish to listen to when we're seeing someone. Here are 6 reasons why people say "I have feelings for you:"

1. You're not ready to say I love you

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This is, perhaps, one of the most common meanings. You just started going out with someone and even when things are going perfectly, you're still not ready to express your love. Also, you might feel unsure about your feelings and don't want to hurt the other person. Another possibility is that maybe you already love that person but you don't want to rush things or look needy, so you just use the phrase to see how  the other responds.

2. To scare someone

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This is a shady trick that's also very common. When someone is interested in you only on a physical level and you want to scare them away, this is a very useful hoax. If you say you have feelings for someone who only wants to have casual sex with you, that person will disappear, since they're not looking for something more.

3. A friendship is evolving into a "romantic" relationship

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Contrary to the previous point, if someone within a friendship reveals they have feelings for the other, in most cases it means that they're physically attracted to them. By saying the famous phrase, you're doing a subtle first approach without risking your friendship. Of course, there's also the possibility of truly having a romantic interest in your friend and you're saying it to see how the relationship evolves.

4. To break up with someone you still care about

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Breaking up with someone can be very difficult and painful, especially if you still care for that person. It's stating that even when you still have feelings for that person, the best course of action is to end the relationship. However, it can be as mediocre as the classic '"it's not you, it's me." Being honest in these situations is the healthiest thing you can do, so don't fall into stereotypes.

5. You want closure

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Sometimes when we have a crush on someone and we know they don't like us back, we silently accumulate these passionate emotions. After a while, all these feelings overwhelm us, so the best thing to do is to let them go. Admitting you have feelings for them will take the burden off your shoulders and will help you get that closure you need to move on.

6. To manipulate the other

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This is probably the worst, but sadly it can be a common occurrence. Manipulative people will do anything to make the other stay next to them. Sometimes we want to be loved by others so bad that we believe anything they say.

These are just the most common meanings behind this famous line. Remember that there are as many possibilities as colors in the world. If someone tells you this famous phrase, analyze the intentions behind it to know where you're standing. If you're the one saying it, consider the reasons why you're saying it in the first place. 

Psychology Today