5 Things You Need To Remember When Hes Not Texting Back

Hes not too busy, he does check his phone, and he can come up with something longer than haha.

When you’re waiting for a guy to text you, all sorts of crazy, illogical, and desperate thoughts can run through your mind. The more you like him, the more impatient you get, and the more insecure you feel as the time goes by. Your phone becomes like an extension of your hand, and you’re so focused on waiting for it to vibrate or make that little “ding!” sound, that you can’t really pay attention to anything else. Basically, for as long as it takes to get that text (minutes, hours, or even days), it’s the number one priority in your mind. 

by Arvida Byström

During this time, you explore every single possibility that could explain why this guy isn’t texting you. If you really like him, and you just started going out with him, you might make up excuses for him: “maybe he’s too busy with work,” “maybe he doesn’t check his phone that often, so he still hasn’t seen that message I sent him three hours ago,” or (my personal favorite) “maybe he’s too shy, and he doesn’t want to text me because he’s afraid.” But these excuses are all in your head, and they have more to do with you and how interested you are in this person than with reality. So, please, do yourself a favor and stop justifying these guys. 

If you ever find yourself sitting at home, staring at your phone, practically willing it to make a text appear in your notifications, remember these pearls of wisdom from yours truly: 

1) If he wants to text you, he will text you.

 This is the golden rule of texting, the one thing you need to remember, even if you forget everything else on this list. If the guy’s interested, he will text you, call you, and do whatever it takes to get in touch with you. He will even double text, if he feels like it’s necessary. 

2) If he wants to see you, he will text you to ask you out somewhere and make plans. 

This might sound a little old-fashioned, but believe me, it’s not. When you like someone, you want to spend time with them. So, if he likes you, he will ask you out, just like you should ask him out whenever you feel like it. The thing is, you shouldn’t be the one who always does the asking out. Wait for him to text you and see how much he wants to see you. 

3) A short “Hey, how’s your day going?” or “Want to hang out tomorrow?” takes literally seconds to write.

 There’s no way he’s so that busy, that he can’t text you one sentence. No matter how busy he might be, if he wants to text you and hear from you, he will do it. (Wouldn’t you take 30 seconds from your day to text someone important to you?) 

4) Remember the past? 

Remember how he texted you in the beginning, when you first met and you still hadn’t had sex with him? How he would always text back quickly and not respond with lazy one-word responses that left you doing all the heavy lifting in the conversation? That was him showing he was interested. If he’s not texting you anymore, then it's time to take a seat and see if all of that waiting and heavy lifting is worth it. 

5) Your guy is no dummy.

 He knows he needs to text you if he wants to go out with you and wants you to know he’s interested. This is the 21st century, and everyone knows that’s how dating works these days. Don’t fall for any of that “I don’t like texting” or “I’m just really bad at it” nonsense. 


You don’t want to date someone who’s not sure if he likes you or not, or someone who likes you, but isn’t interested enough. You deserve better! So, if he decides you’re not worth his attention, don’t waste your time waiting for it. Text your friends and send them all the cool memes you would’ve sent to this guy. Go out with them and have some fun. Don’t just sit at home waiting for this guy to text you: he’s not sitting around waiting for your text. 

No guy is worth all this waiting and obsessing. Believe me when I say that the saying is true: there are so many other fish in the sea.


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