How can you tell your friendship with someone has turned into something else?
We can’t control who we fall in love with, which makes the experience both exciting and completely illogical. That’s why falling in love with a friend or having a crush on them makes you feel like you’ve entered the Twilight Zone: you know you cared about them before you started having those feelings, you’ve always enjoyed spending time with them, you trust them, and they feel the same way about you. But still, you feel like something's changed. How can you know for sure that your friendship isn't just evolving, but that it's actually on the verge of becoming a completely different type of relationship? Well, there are signs that can tell you that what you and your friend have is turning into something else.
Your body language changes
Maybe you’re not expressing your feelings with words, but your body language definitely gives you away. The clearest signal is if you “accidentally” touch them more than usual. I mean, if your hands touch when you're walking, that's probably an accidental touch. But if those touches happen too often, or if they’re paired with you both mirroring your movements, a change in the way they look at you, or touching the other person when you’re talking, you can be sure you’re no longer see each other as friends.
You get jealous
Getting jealous isn’t really one of the best things about being in love, but it’s a natural reaction to seeing another person trying to flirt with your partner or your crush. This is particularly noticeable if your friend is in a relationship or they're dating someone. If you suddenly start getting jealous, that, my friend, is a sure signal that you’ve fallen for them. And of course, let’s not forget that it also happens the other way around: if your friend unexpectedly starts acting more protective than before, or is noticeably uncomfortable if someone tries to flirt with you, that means they no longer see you as a friend, but something more.
Maybe, in the past, when the two of you hung out together, you could be cool and not worry about anything. But if you do feel the tension –you know what I’m talking about: it can be anything from an urge to kiss them to just hooking up with them–, it means you no longer see them as just friends. If you're not sure yet that that's what it really means, just picture that tension in another scenario to see what I’m talking about. When you’re with your other friends, you don’t feel like kissing them, right?
You daydream about them
Yeah, you have a great time with your friend, so you get excited every time you see them. However, if they’re in your thoughts 24/7 and you really long to see them, that means you’ve been hit by one of Cupid’s arrows. And not only that. If you’re actually fantasizing about being in a relationship with them, just accept it. You’ve fallen in love. Your thoughts and daydreams are pretty self-explanatory when it comes to your feelings.
If you hang out with someone else, they become the third wheel
Even if you’re extremely close BFFs, if you hang out with someone else, that person can be perfectly integrated with the two of you. However, when you and your friend are in love, you’re so focused on each other that the rest of the world seems to vanish, and the poor third friend who decided to hang out with you becomes the dreaded third wheel.
You remember everything about them
I mean, when you talk with a friend, you're supposed to remember what they told you. However, if you go all Cady Heron on them and remember not only that, but the date, what they were wearing, if they had a new haircut, if they smiled when they said something, and other tiny details nobody really cares about but you, you’ve definitely fallen for them. As for them, if you notice your friend remembers details about yourself that you don't even remember yourself, it’s very likely that you’ve acquired a new significance for them.
You can’t stop talking about them
This sign also gives you away. Because you can’t get them out of your mind, you have to find a way to voice out your thoughts and feelings. And I don’t mean just mentioning your friend when someone asks about them or when they come up in a conversation. It actually means that you make the conversation about them as soon as you find the chance to do so, or if you want to take it a bit further, making the conversation about them just because.
If you’ve felt some of these things, it’s better to be honest with your friend and be open about your feelings. They’ll probably feel the same way, even if they don't, at least you’re being honest. I know one of the greatest risks of doing so is “ruining” that friendship. However, that fear might stop you from having a great time with someone you’ve cared for a long time before you started having feelings for them.
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Photos by Chris and Ruth