7 Things A Guy Should Know About Vaginas Before Having Sex
May 31, 2018|María Isabel Carrasco Cara Chards
Because getting the anatomy right is one of the easiest ways to guarantee you're going to have good sex.
You might be thinking, what the hell are they going to talk about that I don’t know already, right? And yet, you’re here. This is the thing, I’ve been writing for a while now, and most of the time, I go to the comments section and I can’t help but feel so disappointed in humanity, especially when it comes to articles about sexuality. You have no idea (unless you’re one of those people making the comments) how much ignorance there is regarding the subject, not to mention the number of guys wanting to teach us, people with vaginas, as if they were the holders of the truth, when they’re actually just sharing nonsensical, misleading, and incorrect information about the female body. So, the idea of this article isn’t precisely directed at these people (though I really hope they read it), but to those guys who really want to know what’s going on down there and are easily misled by all the false information out there.
Getting to know the female body isn’t as hard as people believe. It's actually a great way to understand better what works for us, what doesn’t, and more importantly, where everything is (yes, that’s an issue that even many women ignore). This article will be Vaginas 101, the very basics of female anatomy everybody should know to avoid believing the same erroneous information. And more importantly, so that you know what's going on there in advance.
Vulvas and vaginas are two different things
We have to start with the most basic point. Most likely, what you call a vagina is actually the vulva, but don’t worry, it’s one of the most common mistakes out there, so let’s clear things up. The vagina is the elastic muscular canal that leads to the uterus and the cervix. The vulva, on the other hand, is the external structure of the female genitalia. This one includes the labia, clitoris, the opening of the urethra, the perineum, pubis, and the vaginal opening. It's a huge difference, isn’t it?
Each vulva is different
This one is very important, and it's what inspired me to write this article. For many reasons that we're all aware of, many people think that vaginas should look only one way, or rather, only one type of vulva is considered desirable. For starters, vulvas are like fingerprints: each one is unique and different. They come in all sorts of shapes, with longer or shorter labia; some of them aren’t symmetrical, while others have longer clitorises; some vulvas come in different colors, textures, and we could go on and on. The point is that there isn’t a perfect vulva since each one is great in its own way. In other words, there’s not one particular way they should look: they just are.
Vaginas are extremely elastic
Ok, now that we've covered the basics, let’s focus on the actual vaginas. One of the things that makes this organ so special is its elastic nature. Despite the many myths surrounding it - including the idea that once you “lose your virginity” it’ll never be as tight as it was, or that bigger penises can make them looser - vaginas actually go back to their original shape thanks to the elasticity of the muscle wall.
Vaginas have their own way of lubricating
Although sometimes lubrication is completely essential, all vaginas have their own lubricating system. One of the main components of this natural lube is called squalene, which can be also found in the livers of sharks (actually, it’s often called shark liver oil). This substance provides a lot of moisture to the skin and also helps keeping the elasticity. Now, unlike what many would think, it’s not an automatic mechanism that just opens whenever we want. For some, it’s easier to lubricate when they start getting aroused, and for others, it takes longer to achieve it; it really depends on each person.
The clitoris has double the nerve endings as a penis
So, this point isn't exactly about the vagina, but it's still very important in sex, if you ask me. The clitoris is that little, let’s call it button, right above the vaginal opening. Penises generally have about 4,000 nerve endings (you probably know already how great that works for you), but the clitoris has 8,000, which makes it a super important organ when it comes to having an orgasm, but too many people don’t really think about it when they have sex. What’s great about the clitoris is that’s it’s the only organ in the human body whose only job is to give pleasure. In other words, it doesn’t have any other function than that, which brings us to the next and very important point.
Vaginal intercourse isn’t always enough
When we talk about intercourse we’re actually talking about the thrusting of the penis, fingers, or whatever toy. However, it’s been proven that most women don’t reach an orgasm through vaginal intercourse only. That’s why it’s important to know the entire vulva, especially our friend, the clitoris, which is the most pleasurable and probably the easiest way to have a mind-blowing orgasm.
It’s normal to have some discharge
Finally, we had to discuss a topic that’s very common in comments about the vagina and that couldn’t be more wrong. Just so you know, it’s normal to have some vaginal discharge; it’s part of our menstrual cycle, even when we’re not on our period. So, no, vaginal discharge doesn’t automatically mean STDs or any other problem, as some people think. However, it’s important to visit the gyno if you have doubts or something seems different.
I think it’s unbelievable that in the 21st century there’s still so much misleading and incorrect information about something as common and normal as vaginas. Why are they still seen as this mysterious place? It won’t take you more than a few minutes to research the anatomy and get reliable information about it.
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Images by @rudooles