This is what happens inside the mind of an infatuated admirer that won’t let go.
Let’s be honest, we all have done it at least once. An innocent web search, a Facebook profile review, an Instagram gallery appreciation. If it was the need to spy on someone or even just for curiosity, we have had the “stalker” hat on and turned into amateur FBI agents. Doesn’t matter who we stalk: former partners, family members, or even for future job prospects, it seems pretty innocent, right? There are plenty of reasons to stalk someone and it's no surprise that love is among the first ones. Sure, love makes us do crazy things. But, when we’re talking about the way we express our feelings to our significant other, and even when we’re not with them anymore, how far are you willing to go to keep this affection safe?
Some will consider walking around someone’s house 20 times a day, taking pictures while hiding from them, constantly sending tokens of appreciation, and knowing another human better than themselves is an excellent way to show love. But becoming this fixated for someone is not particularly ideal. That’s just the tip of the iceberg that entails the personality of a stalker.
Why does it happen with such prevalence? Why are there so many celebrities being stalked to the point that we can call it harassment? According to John Moore, a licensed professional counselor in Chicago and author of Confusing Love With Obsession, stalkers partly feel that they don’t receive enough attention from their loved one, and partly thinking that, in fact, they're most important person in their loved one’s life. They alter their own lifestyle to focus on their target, to the point that they might end up isolated from society and taking on passive-aggressive attitudes. It becomes really frustrating for them to seek for love and attention from their target, and that's so important for them that everything else becomes irrelevant in their lives.
In an effort to get into a true stalker’s mindset, many writers have developed overwhelming characters that make us shiver to our very core. Since Hollywood is flooded with this kind of people, they have become professionals when it comes to portraying a stalker from head to toes. Some of the most memorable stories we have seen in the big screen are:
Based on Stephen King's novel, the movie shows Kathy Bates as Annie Wilkes, a woman that obsesses over writer Paul Sheldon (James Caan). When he randomly ends up being rescued by her after he suffers a car crash near her house, Annie becomes delusional about the perfection in Paul’s novels, to the point that she doesn’t want him to go anywhere until he writes a new book to her favorite saga. To do so, she'll even recur to drastic measures, like breaking his ankles so he can't escape. But from her perspective, she loves him so much she can't watch him run away leave his novel unfinished. Being this supportive can only come from someone who truly loves him, right?
Exes are among the most popular reasons why people start stalking. And that’s exactly the point Cameron Díaz makes while playing Julie, an obsessed ex-girlfriend that can’t leave David (Tom Cruise) alone. She crashes his party, thinking that deep inside, he does want to see her, even though she wasn’t invited. She follows him everywhere to keep track of his life. She wants to make sure she is the one that knows him best and the one that loves him best. Feeling discouraged after seeing David with another woman, Julie takes desperate measures and attempts to kill herself with David in a car crash. She loves him so much that if he can’t understand that they belong together, they will go to the afterlife together.
One night stands are an open door to so much more, including emotions and relationships. At least that’s how Alex (Glenn Close) sees it after meeting Dan (Michael Douglas) during one of these random encounters. She falls so hard for him that she convinces herself it must be true love. Reluctant to let him go, Alex gets creative and finds ways to catch Dan’s attention as well as his heart. Her feelings for him are so strong that she doesn’t mind ending some lives in the way. She proves that nothing is impossible for the one who holds the key to your heart.
Sleeping with the Enemy
Imagine your loved one dies in a terrible way. Wouldn't you keep them in your heart them although they’re not with you anymore? But what happens when you find out that your partner actually faked their own death, changed their identity, and tried to leave no trace of their past life? And most important, they are doing this whole thing, just to get away from you. Love is forever, no matter what. That’s what Laura’s (Julia Roberts) ex-husband (Patrick Bergin) thinks of romantic relationships and what will move him to bring her back to his life, no matter what.
Certainly, movies tend to exaggerate personality traits to make a point. But for someone with such strong feelings, it’s never enough. And we know that, very often, reality overcomes fiction. The world we live in holds secrets, thoughts, and feelings that no filmmaker will be able to express. And when it comes to something so huge like love, our heart rules our reasoning.
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