8 Songs That Will Make You Realize Your Partner Is Using You

You can’t just play with people’s feelings ... I’m just tired of being played like a violin ...

In the name of love we justify many things. We can tolerate a person's bad habits, the same way we expect them to tolerate ours. We can also tolerate their friends and family, who can sometimes be a pain in the ass. We can change our taste on different options, we can engage in new activities we never thought of doing before, and we can even agree to committing to new lifestyle decisions others never expected from us –like exercising.

Love, then, can change a person in many ways, this can be positive but negative as well. What is not acceptable or justifiable is the fact that someone manipulates or takes advantage of you because you are in love with this person. There are no excuses when it comes to allowing your partner to use you for their own benefit, but don’t take my word for it; instead, listen to the lessons these artist have for you on relationships that are just not good for you.

Rihanna, “Love On The Brain”

“I’m just tired of being played like a violin.” In this song Rihanna questions why she keeps on tolerating her partner, whom she can’t seem to meet all expectations required and be as perfect as he wants her to be. Her song is a contradiction and mess of emotions, something we can all relate to. In a way, she is tired of it all, but at the same time, she begs him to love her. This is one of those moments where love overcomes reason. Ultimately, if someone doesn’t appreciate you for who you are, they don’t love you and they’re not worthy of your heart.

Gotye, “Somebody That I Used to Know”

This song is the perfect example of how love can blind a person to the point where they no longer understand their partner's motives and intentions. For example, Gotye sings about how his partner made him believe they had problems, “But had me believing it was always something that I’d done.” He then expresses how he feels now that time has passed and what his partner actually did. He is angry about how she used him and questions the way things ended.

Gnash, “I hate u, I love u”

In this song, the artist starts with one simple statement: “Feeling used but I’m still missing you.” It contrasts the logic of the brain, with the feelings of the heart. Many are trapped in this dilemma where there is no real answer for “what do I do?” From one perspective, you know this relationship isn’t right; yet, at the same time you can’t seem to able to get this person out of your mind. The answer isn’t simple, but only time will heal you.

Carrie Underwood, “Before He Cheats”

In this song, Underwood has already gotten over missing and caring about her cheating ex. She then sings about how she is never letting this happen to her again because she has learned from her mistake. “Maybe next time he thinks before he cheats,” Underwood sings after busting her ex's car for betraying her.

Marion Cottilard, “Take It All”

This song is part of the musical Nine (2009), in this movie, Cotillard’s husband is a famous film director who keeps having affairs with many women. She is tired of his behavior and of being used. In this song, she tells him “So take it all … but at the end there will be nothing left of me,” meaning that her patience is running out. The song is a cry out from a woman who has given everything and now is tired and done attempting to make it work.

Justin Timberlake, “Cry Me A River”

In this songs, his former partner is seeking to reconcile with him, or get back. But he remembers how she treated him and the way she did it: “You told me you loved me, Why did you leave me all alone?” In this song, Timberlake teaches us that we don’t have to put up with the indecisions of our ex-partners, they had their chance and now we have to move on: “The damage is done, so I guess I be leaving.”

Cee Lo Green, “Forget You”

There is nothing worse than having a partner who is using you for what you have, or what they can get out of being with you. In this song, Cee Lo Green helps us understand that “gold diggers” are not worth of our time and we should just tell them “Forget you.”

Jazmine Sullivan, “Bust Your Windows”

This sassy song tells the story of how a woman took revenge on her ex-partner’s car for toying with her heart. Some of us wish we could be as strong and confident as Sullivan in her song, not necessarily by taking revenge but by clearly stating her anger and showing those who use other people what happens when you play with the wrong heart: “You can’t just play with people’s feelings.”


Love can sometimes blind us to see the reality we are living in. We can hope that our partners will change in the long run, but sometimes that is not the case. You can adapt to a person, but never allow yourself completely change who you are because of someone else; otherwise, you'll become just another possession of this person. Don't allow yourself to be manipulated. Put yourself before your feelings and find someone who really cares about you.


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