You've probably had several people fall for you and you didn't even noticed.
You might be a cynic regarding love, but you're probably just like everybody else in the world in an endless quest to find true love. It’s part of our nature, and no matter how much we’ve gotten hurt in the past, or even how much we want to trick ourselves into believing that it's not something we want or a priority, deep down we’re always looking for that special person that complements us and makes us happy. By now, you might be thinking that I’m saying all this because I’m a hopeless romantic who doesn’t see things for how they really are or doesn't focus on what actually matters.
I'll be honest, even though it’s not a priority in my life, love is always on my mind. When we're unable to find that perfect person, we tend to lose hope and start believing that love doesn’t really exist because we haven’t found it yet. Again, that is pretty normal, but no matter how cynical you are, it’s a scientific fact that at least once in your life someone will fall for you, just like you’ll fall for someone as well.
We live in a world with around 7.5 billion people, so it’s impossible to say that you’ll never find the perfect person for you. Now, going to the core understanding of humanity, evolution, it’s a fact that we idealize love in a very romantic way, but as living creatures, we also respond to instinct, and believe it or not, love is definitely a part of it. Ifyou put it in the crudest terms possible, it would seem as a response to our mating instinct but, in fact, we naturally feel attracted and will attract at least one person in the course of our lives. In evolutionary psychology, this is called "the science of attraction," and as we'll see throughout the article, these are just our primal and more instinctual responses to life and social relationships.
One of the most studied factors related to attraction and love is the way in which our senses can determine our infatuation or likeness towards another person, and smell is the one that actually makes the most important work, not sight, which would appear to be the most obvious one. We secrete pheromones, a chemical substance that plays a huge role in sexual attraction not only in humans, but also in other living creatures. According to Bettina Pause (psychologist at Heinrich-Heine-Universität), a lot of our social communication actually happens through chemical signals we don’t even notice. In a very interesting study conducted by Anja Rikowski and Karl Grammer Ludwig (Institute for Human Biology in Vienna), it was determined that women have a more keen sense of smell, to the point that they can actually detect the symmetry of facial features (which also plays an important role in who we find attractive). How can this happen? Through genes and pheromones. It turns out that our human genome contains more than a thousand genes related to scent. In contrast to sight, our perception of smell and scent plays an even more important role in determining our attraction to someone else.
Despite the popular belief that states that opposites attract, this theory has been proven to be baseless. On the contrary, we’re more attracted to people who are similar to us, not only in terms of personality and interests, but also physically. Freud explored this many years ago when he claimed that we’re attracted to people who resemble our parents, and actually studies have proven that we do feel more attracted to people with a certain resemblance in general. In a study conducted by David Perrett (University of St. Andrews), it was discovered that people tend to feel infatuated with people with features of their opposite-sex parents at the moment of their birth.
If you think about these factors, we are naturally, biologically, and evolutionary bound to love and be loved by at least one person in the world because it’s a matter of the survival of our species. So, whether you think about it in philosophical terms, or you want to see love in cynical terms, at the end of the day, it’ll happen: you just have to keep your eyes, mind, and apparently, your sense of smell open.
For more on the science of love, take a look at these:
Images by Adam + Alexandra