One day in 1729, the streets of Dublin were filled with a pamphlet called A Modest Proposal. To be more precise, the whole name of it was A Modest Proposal for Preventing the Children of Poor from Being a Burthen to Their Parents or Country, and for Making them Beneficial to the Publick. Catchy title, right?
Well, the pamphlet, appealed to the upper classes, stating how uncomfortable it was for them to brush shoulders with the destitute, and witness man, woman, and child begging for scraps and money. It also lamented how annoying it was to be chased by children in rags. The stench! The grubby hands! Oh those poor aristocrats, who had to walk down the streets, holding sachets to their noses to mask the wretched smells of the streets.
With an irony raised to the nth degree, this anonymous text explains that the reason behind this problem is the lack of ways to make a proper living. As for children, he convincingly argues that they’re a burden to their parents until they come of age – that is, until they are 12 years old– and can finally have a “formal” job.
But in those 12 years, parents have to raise them and make sure they lead a respectable life, because, as the narrator states, most of these children learn the vicious trickery of thieves, causing a greater harm to society. The solution? Easy: Eat them.
Through very credible math calculations, he states that the sale and consumption of 1-year-old babies would solve all the social problems of Ireland. At the time, the Irish population consisted of approximately 1.5 million people, and from this number, the author calculated that 200,000 would be capable of breeding. Out of these, only 30,ooo would be capable of properly rearing a family, leaving 170,000 breeders that would find it hard to scrape a living.
Considering that many women lose their babies due miscarriages and malnutrition, he subtracted 50,000, leaving 120,000 women who would be more or less capable of giving birth to a child every year. After a series of roundabout calculations, he concludes that there would be 100,000 babies available for regular consumption.
Now, the plan doesn’t end there. The author claimed that a healthy newborn baby wouldn’t be appetizing enough nor fulfilling. So, he suggests women should feed them for a whole year, so they can weigh a plump 28 pounds, like little piglets! With a well fed baby you could prepare 2 full dishes and even host a party!
Now, the author was sympathetic, he knew how hard it would be for a mother to give up her child, but he also argued that women would rather not give birth to children that would end up in the streets begging for crumbs.He calculated that the money needed to feed and support a child per year (rags included) was 2 shillings. If a well-fed, healthy baby can be sold for 10, the family would have a profit of 8 shillings.
The Irish people were in dire straits and these children could potentially become the best food option for everybody. The added bonus of cannibalism? Well, it would end poverty and help families make a living. Also, it would eradicate domestic violence, as husbands would be more protective of their wives in order to help them have save and happy pregnancies.
Naturally, people were shocked by this barbaric proposition. But who was its mastermind? None other than Jonathan Swift, the best satirist in the English language. Famous for writing the classic Gulliver’s Travels, Swift enjoyed mocking society’s visions about life and the problems the country was dealing with, Irish poverty being one of them.
Using the rhetorical language of pamphlets, which were so common at the time, he criticized the lack of empathy and humanity people show when dealing with social issues. The main point of this satirical proposition is to prove how contradictory people can be.
It showed the two faced nature of people that one the one hand were horrified by the prospect of eating poor children, and on the other, not caring if they died from malnutrition or lived in the worst of conditions.
Here you can find this masterful text of English literature.
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