Slut, easy, whore. Society views with shame women who unabashedly enjoy their sexuality. This conception is insidious and hides under a veneer of moral rectitude and strict social norms. We are tied into knots by social rules that were dictated centuries ago and where you could only have one sexual partner for the rest of your life. “What will people say or think?” is a question that floats around when you have to admit how many sexual partners you’ve had. Heaven forbid they go beyond counting with one hand. Funnily enough, if you are a virgin, you are equally desired and mocked.
If we jumped into the pool of stereotypes, your personality would be as follows: if you’ve only had one sexual partner, then you’re an introvert and uptight. Two partners signals that you’re a woman one step away from being an extrovert, and three is a controversial number that could raise a few eyebrows; finally, if you go over 4 you’d be tagged with the heinous “slut” epithet. To hell with all these prejudices and backward thoughts.
The Mens Journal published a note “What the number of Sexual Partners Says About You,” and it included the valuable insight of sex researcher and professor of human sexuality at NYU, Zhana Vrangalova. The professor untangled some conclusions made by experts on what the number means, based on hormone balance, infidelity, and personality for both genders.
She is quick to dispel some misunderstandings: “the differences between the sexes are not as they’re often portrayed in popular media. That all men want to have hundreds of partners and all women just want one long-term partner that they’re going to love and cherish for the rest of their lives. That’s B.S,” says Vrangalova. It turns out that if you look at the median numbers instead of the average in these studies, you’ll find that what women want and what men want is far more similar.
Zhana Vrangalova’s insight shows a reality that has been hidden from sight for a long time, and it offers a new alternative. The roles are shifting and evolving and so too are the perceptions of women’s sexuality. Now, if you survey the younger generations, you’ll see that the number of sexual partners between men and women are closer than in older generations. There are a number of factors that one must bear in mind, such as access to birth control and financial independence, but one factor has been made perfectly clear: women who want more sexual partners have fewer social barriers.
A similar research compiled by Bibiochile revealed that people with multiple partners also have more friends, and this is mainly due to the fact that they are extroverts. “Because of their extroversion, they come off as more positive and happy and people gravitate towards that,” she concludes.
Source:
Men’s Journal
