Yes, it happened to me: my boyfriend decided to break up with me the day before Valentine’s Day. As if the universe was conspiring to make that date even more memorable, but in the least romantic way possible. To put them in context, we had been together for two years, a relationship that to me, at 25 years old at the time, felt like an important achievement.
He was my best friend since college, and that’s what hurts me the most about the whole situation: losing someone so close suddenly. I remember that the day before Valentine’s Day I was full of mixed emotions. We had planned a special night, but something in the air made me feel uncomfortable. He was super apathetic and distant for weeks and only said “nothing” when I asked him what was wrong. He had me anxious and I preferred to give him space. I felt something, but at the same time, I wanted everything to be okay.
We saw each other on February 13 and I intended to talk to him about that “special night” that I had imagined to celebrate Valentine’s Day together. But after dinner, instead of flowers and chocolates, I received unexpected news: my boyfriend wanted to break up. Just then, I felt a kick in my stomach. The complicated thing about breaking up on that date is that you are forced to tell everyone, even those work acquaintances you barely talk to, that your relationship has ended. So, between fake hugs and forced smiles, I found myself in the difficult position of pretending that everything was fine when, in reality, my heart was in pieces.
It was hard to deal with the fact that not only was my best friend no longer my boyfriend, but he was also walking away from my life. The lack of tact in choosing that moment hurt me more than the breakup itself. However, in his defense, I must say that, according to him, he had been feeling this way for months, but he simply couldn’t find a way to communicate it to me. Sometimes people just don’t know how to handle the end of a relationship.
Time has passed, and now I can say that what doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger. After that Valentine’s Day, I realized that I deserve better and that life has strange ways of teaching us lessons. Laughter has replaced anger, and the tears have evaporated. Although the love and friendship I felt for him faded, they left room for new experiences and, above all, for self-love. So, if any of you are having a less-than-ideal Valentine’s Day, remember that time heals everything and that self-love is the best gift we can give ourselves (Regards Nicki Nicole, by the way, :c).
Thanks to Cultura Colectiva and Tia Ceci for this space to vent.
Sincerely: Valentine’s Day
Tia Ceci’s space and this community are to express what you feel and live; If you want to share your story, send it to tia@culturacolectiva.com
This story was originally published in Spanish in Cultura Colectiva.
